Like a heartbeat
by roxake19
Summary: The Prince of Camelot doesn't care. Merlin is his manservant, not his friend. Not his lover. Merlin is an idiot, a clumsy one at that and a man. The prince has Guinevere. Sweet, beautiful, loving, smart Guinevere. He doesn't need Merlin. Arthur/Merlin.


**Disclaimer:** _As if..._

**A/N:** My first Merlin fic. It's unbeta ed and english is not my native tongue so I'm the one to blame for everything that's wrong with this fic.

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"But some emotions don't make a lot of noise. It's hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint - like a heartbeat. And pure love - why, some days it's so quiet, you don't even know it's there."

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Prince Arthur Pendragon loves women. Not men. Women. So no he doesn't dream of his idiot of a manservant nor does he want to cry out his name everytime he comes inside of another one of his** –**_female_- conquests. And no, he doesn't avoid Merlin after he realises he loves him because he doesn't realise a thing. Nor does he snap at the younger boy because of his realisation. The Prince snaps at him because the idiot is the worst manservant ever. And the prince doesn't want to punch himself when he catches a glimpse of hurt on Merlin's face after another rather violent burst.

The crown Prince of Camelot does none of these things because he doesn't care. Merlin is his manservant, not his friend. Not his lover. Merlin is an idiot, a clumsy one at that and a _man._ The prince has Guinevere. Sweet, beautiful, loving, smart_, female_ Guinevere. The prince doesn't need Merllin.

Prince Arthur doesn't need Merlin. So when the clumsiness on Merlin's part and the erections caused by the younger boy's bending over on the prince's part, become to much to bare Merlin is fired. For good. Because the prince doesn't care.

Prince Arthur doesn't care that less than two weeks later Merlin is smiling care free as if the Prince doesn't mean a thing to him. He doesn't care that Morgana - who Merlin had been shooting death glares at for months after they had found her - is now the raven-haired boy's constant companion. He doesn't care when he catches Morgana blushing and looking at Merlin when the heir announces he is to wed Guinevere.

Prince Arthur doesn't care. That's why he doesn't feel betrayed when he sees Merlin's eyes flash gold one night. That's why he doesn't cry the night he finds Merlin pressing Morganna against the wall of a dark corridor, her hands fists in his hair while the pale boy thrusts inside her again and again. Prince Arthur has Guinivere. He takes her to his chambers everynight after their wedding. He cares for her. He learns to cry out her name.

King Arthur doesn't care. He doesn't care when a month after his father's death Morgause appears in the castle and demands Morgana's rightfull place to the throne -and starts killing people when the king not so politely declines- his half sister replies that she doesn't want to rule a kindom because she already has all she wants and gestures towards Merlin. He doesn't care that when he makes Merlin court sorcerer the idiot asks for a bed for two. The king doesn't care when he watches Merlin mop for years and years after Morgana's second disappearence. He doesn't care that Merlin looks at him as if it were his fault.

The Great King Arthur doesn't care that at the darkest of times, when Mordred's army marches towards Camelot less than a year after Guinevere's betrayal, the only one that can bring a smile to his face is Merlin. He doesn't care when Merlin looks away from him -seconds before the king dies- to Morgana who is taking care of the dead body of his murderer. The king doesn't care that when Merlin looks down at him again he seems in more pain than ever before. The king doesn't care. That's why in his last moments he doesn't let himself cry mentally at the thought that the idiot loved him back.

Prince Arthur Pendragon didn't care. Crown Prince Arthur Pendragon had Guinevere. He took her to his chambers every night. He cared for her. And when Guinevere left with Lancelot, King Arthur continued not to care. The Great King Arthur had his people. He took care of them daily.

Arthur didn't care. He didn't care about what his stupid mind said when the rest of his being screamed at him that he loved Merlin. Arthur didn't care of the potential consequences everytime he stared for a little too long at Merlin. Arthur didn't care that he was dying as long as Merlin was holding him, showing him that he cared.

Arthur only ever truly cared about one thing. _Mer_lin.


End file.
